Hmm, I was expecting visitor #1000 today, but some magic occured and Im down to 350 visits, interesting.

NFC East

Dallas Cowboys (5-3) - Despite some late game chokes, the Cowboys still have a respectable record. Drew Bledsoe is having a great first year under Bill Parcells with a 97.4 QB rating, and 2,019 throwing yards. The defense has been playing great lately, not letting up anymore than 13 points in the last four games.
Projected Record- 8-8. Tough games at Philadelphia, New York Giants, Washington and Carolina will be tough to overcome. Moreover, Denver at home will prove to be a loss.

New York Giants (6-2) - This team is flat out good this year. They have weapons at every offensive position. The underrated Tiki Barber is averaging 5 yards a carry with 760 rushing yards. Plaxico Burress is unstoppable with 656 yards and 5 touchdowns. Tight end Jeremy Shockey has 530 receiving yards and 5 touchdowns. The defense has really stepped their game up lately, led by a rejuvenated Michael Strahan and Antonio Pierce.
Projected Record- 12-4. The Giants have a tough schedule ahead and will not win at Seattle or in Philadelphia. Big home wins over Philadelphia, Dallas, and Kansas City will propel them to the NFC East championship.

Philadelphia Eagles (4-4) – Drama. Soap Opera. Who cares? This team is struggling right now. Although McNabb is putting up big numbers (2,338 yards), the offense is struggling in the absence of a running game and homerun threat. Brian Westbrook only has 328 yards rushing, but is great at catching short passes with 478 yards receiving.
Projected Record- 10-6. The Eagles have a somewhat favorable schedule to close out. They will defeat division rivals Dallas and New York at home. The only losses for the second half will come at New York and at home against Seattle. They will close the season with 4 wins in a row against the Giants, Rams, Cardinals, and Redskins, and head into the playoffs on a roll.

Washington Redskins (5-3) – Mark Brunell discovered the fountain of youth this season with a QB rating of 90.3. Clinton Portis is having a strong year with 620 rushing yards. Santana Moss has come out of nowhere to be the top long ball threat with 856 receiving yards and 5 touchdowns. Lavar Arrington is making big plays again on the other side of the ball, and Greg Williams’s defense might just be the best in the league.
Projected Record- 9-7. The Redskins will lose a tough game at home against the Chargers, and lose the last three games of the season against division rivals Dallas, New York, and Philadelphia.

NFC North

Chicago Bears (5-3) – Make no mistakes, this team is all about defense. Comparisons to the 2000 Ravens are however incorrect. Trent Dilfer was better than Kyle Orton who only has a QB rating of 62.9 and 9 interceptions. Thomas Jones is banged up right now, but has had a strong season with 753 rushing yards.
Projected Record- 9-7. The Bears will not defeat Atlanta or Carolina. Moreover, the game in Pittsburgh might get ugly for them.

Detroit Lions (3-5) – This team is absolutely horrible. When the QB controversy is between Joey Harrington and Jeff Garcia, you might as well quit for the season. Teams can stack the line against Kevin Jones all day long as proven by his 381 yards at an average of 3 yards per carry. The defense is respectable, but is on the filed entirely too long. By the way, did anyone get the missing persons mailer featuring Mike Williams, Charles Rogers, and Roy Williams? I did to.
Projected Record- 4-12. The Lions will squeak out a win against the cursed Saints. However, they will lose to everyone else, including sorry teams such as Arizona and Minnesota. Games against Atlanta, Cincinnati and Pittsburgh will get out of hand.

Green Bay Packers (1-7) – These guys might be a little better than their record shows as they have lost some heartbreakers. However, they still are a terrible team this year. Brett Favre just looks finished and is making bad plays. His QB rating is an UnFavre 82.9, and has already thrown 14 interceptions. Leading rushers Ahman Green and Najeh Davenport are out. The running game is now based around unknown Samkon Gado. Moreover, it is another year, and another sorry defense.
Projected Record- 3-13. The Packers will squeak out wins at home against the Vikings and Lions. Games on the road against Atlanta, Philadelphia, and Chicago will prove to be too much.

Minnesota Vikings (3-5) – Will Brad Johnson help this team? He had a great first game against Detroit with 298 yards throwing, and 3 touchdowns. The lack of a running game hurts as Mewelde Moore and Michael Bennett have only rushed for 545 yards. Just like usual, the Vikings defense is weak, and is showing no signs of improvement.
Projected Record- 4-12. The Vikings will get one more win at Detroit. Unfortunately for them, games against the Giants, Steelers, and Bears.

NFC South

Atlanta Falcons (6-2) – Michael Vick doesn’t want anyone to criticize his passing game after a 228 yard passing performance against the Dolphins. His rating is still 70.8 and he has only passed for 951 yards. Nonetheless, the Falcons win with him at QB, and he has rushed for a spectacular 340 yards. Moreover, Warrick Dunn has rushed for 820 yards. The running game is no secret, but the one dimensional Alge Crumpler passing game needs to improve.
Projected Record- 13-3. The only loss in the second half of the season will come at Carolina. They will get their revenge in the last game of the season defeating the Panthers at home. The Falcons will knock off pretend teams such as Tampa Bay and Chicago.

Carolina Panthers (6-2) – Jake Delhomme (94.5 rating, 14 touchdowns) and Steve Smith (903 yards, 9 touchdowns), are the best QB/WR combination in football right now. Smith is quietly having one of the most impressive seasons at wide receiver in recent memory. The Panthers defense is strong, and steps it up in big game situations. The Panthers will be playing in the NFC championship, and have all the ingredients of a Super Bowl team.
Projected Record- 13-3. The only remaining loss will come in the last game of the season at Atlanta. They will knock Atlanta off at home, and also knock off teams such as Tampa Bay, Chicago, and Dallas.

New Orleans Saints (2-7) – Aaron Brooks should not be a starter in the NFL with a 66.6 rating and 12 interceptions. Antowain Smith (360 yards, 4.8 average) has done a respectable job replacing Deuce McAllister who is out with a torn ACL. Tough calls at the ends of games, and heartbreaking losses prove this team is cursed. They just have too much on their minds with the hurricane and rumors of relocation.
Projected Record- 2-14. They will not win another game. Maybe they can knock off the Jets or the Lions, but I still don’t see it happening. Back to back games against the Falcons and Panthers will hurt.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (5-3) – Bad losses to San Francisco and Carolina in recent weeks have shown this teams true colors. Chris Simms will not get the job done in this league at starting QB (69.5 rating.) The Cadillac has been awful quiet as of late, but still has 496 yards up to this point. Their defense will always be solid and keep this team in games.
Projected Record- 7-9. The Bucs will win their remaining two games against New Orleans. However, they will not get past the likes of the Redskins, Falcons, or Panthers.

NFC West

Arizona Cardinals (2-6) – Josh McCown (69.1 rating, 8 interceptions) and Kurt Warner (73.4 rating) will not lead this team to victories. The running game is absent, as Marcell Shipp leads the team with 241 rushing yards. Anquan Boldin is out. The one bright spot is Larry Fitzgerald with 713 receiving yards and 4 touchdowns.
Projected Record- 4-12 – The Cardinals can get wins against the Lions and 49ers. Games against teams such as the Rams, Jaguars, Texans, and Colts will all result in losses.

St Louis Rams (4-4) – Marc Bulger has been upgraded to probable for the game coming up against Seattle. He has had a good year with a 90.8 rating and 11 touchdowns. Steven Jackson is an animal with 659 rushing yards and 6 touchdowns. Torry Holt (638 yards, 4 touchdowns) and Kevin Curtis (536 yards, 4 touchdowns) are both having great years. The defense remains suspect.
Projected Record- 9-7. The Rams will get wins against the likes of Minnesota and Houston, and will pull out a huge win in the final game at Dallas. Losses to Seattle, Washington, and Philadelphia will occur.

San Francisco 49ers (2-6) – Tim Rattay leads all statistical QB categories for the 49ers, so that should tell you something. The current 1-2 punch of Cody Pickett and Jesse Palmer is the worst since Spinks got knocked out by Tyson. Jesse Palmer is a joke and should not ever be allowed to wear an NFL uniform ever again after he embarrassed himself on reality television. The San Francisco defense is decent, but they are on the field basically all game. Brandon Lloyd who has 400 receiving yards in an atrocious offense is showing potential with his circus style catches. Kevin Barlow (424 yards) and Frank Gore (271 yards, 5.1 average) provide a solid running game.
Projected Record- 3-13. The 49ers will beat the Titans, but fail against teams such as Chicago, Seattle, Arizona, and Houston.

Seattle Seahawks (6-2). Shaun Alexander is the best running back in the game right now. With 949 rushing yards, and 14 touchdowns, expect to see Alexander make his money next season. Matt Hasselbeck is an efficient leader with a 90.9 rating and 10 touchdowns. The running game dominates here though, as shown by Darrel Jackson leading in receiving with only 376 yards. The defense plays strong, and the Seahawks may just live up to their hype this season.
Projected Record- 13-3. The only remaining loss will come against the Colts. The Seahawks will knock off strong opponents such as the Giants and Eagles.

First of all, what the hell is with the balloons? How am I supposed to write about sports with a sky blue backround and balloons? After this maybe I'll go pick some flowers.

Anyways, to the subject at hand. Today feels like a ranting kind of day because I am very upset with some things. The subject I plan on covering has seen just as much coverage as the OJ trial. Onto the title, if you are an internet obsessed freak as I am, you know the term do not feed the trolls. If you don't know, here is a brief description. People who go on message boards, and purposely ask stupid questions or flame people are called trolls. They want attention. Message board moderators tell users "don't feed the trolls" or they win. Trolls want to get their name out there, get a rise out of people. Therefore, if users pay them no attention, the trolls just look like fools and they disappear. See where I'm going with this yet?

That Wide Receiver whose name will not be mentioned is a troll. Every newspaper and sports network is feeding the troll. Guess what people; the Eagles are in last place! The troll is not playing, that is the story plain and simple. So stop! Stop with the timelines, the interviews, and the same damn highlights over and over again! In the past 24 hours, how many times have we all seen some kind of segment on the troll and the Eagles? This writer lost count around 20 times.

So many stories that are being paid no attention… How about the Seattle Seahawks and free agent to be Shaun Alexander’s monster year? Do the media care about the FIRST place New York Giants and their emotional season? Is the monster year Carolina wide receiver Steve Smith is having no big deal? Does he need to talk more and be more controversial? Why isn’t anyone paying attention to the AFC West? The Chargers, Chiefs and Broncos will be involved in a dogfight for the playoffs.

It is clear, none of these stories matter. The media wants to cover the soap opera story of the Eagles and their troll. The coverage doesn’t seem like it is going to slow down anytime soon. Here is some advice, stop feeding the troll ESPN, newspapers, and sports radio shows. Maybe when a final decision on the troll is made, cover it briefly. If the troll goes to a team, cover it briefly. General sports fans have seen enough of this garbage. I’m sure Philadelphia Eagle fans are tired of this story. NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR THIS ANYMORE! At least give the other great stories occurring in football this season some equal time. EVERY OTHER SEGMENT DOES NOT HAVE TO BE ABOUT THE TROLL. That reminds me, the Colts and Patriots are playing tonight; let’s see how ESPN does on the pre-game coverage…

Breaking News- So the troll won't be back in an Eagles uniform according to Andy Reid at his press conference. Good. That is all we need to hear about it. Please do not mention this subject until the troll is picked up by a new team.

Last Week 11-3!!! Overall- 29-13

Tennessee AT Cleveland- These two teams are terrible. McNair is expected to play. After the Browns loss to Houston, I might not pick them ever again. My pick- TITANS

Oakland AT Kansas City- This one could end up being a shootout. Both defenses are pretty suspect. I have to lean towards the KC with the home field advantage. My pick- CHIEFS

Atlanta AT Miami- Falcons are coming off a bye week. Vick has a terrible QB rating of 63. However, they keep winning as a result of their strong rushing game. My pick- FALCONS

Detroit AT Minnesota- Ughh. The Vikings might be the worst team in the league right now. The Lions aren't that far behind. Im still not sold on Jeff Garcia, but it appears Joey Harrington will be starting after Garcia got banged up last week. This is a CRAPshoot. My pick- LIONS

San Diego AT New York Jets- The Jets are having an abysmal season. The Chargers might be the best 4-4 team ever. San Diego just has too many weapons, and the Jets really don't have anything. My pick- CHARGERS

Carolina AT Tampa Bay- The Bucs may have shown their true colors last week against the Niners. They have a strong defense, but Jake Delhomme and Steve Smith cannot be stopped right now. The Panthers are a strong team this year who will probably play for the NFC Championship. My pick- PANTHERS

Houston AT Jacksonville- Last year the Texans opened up shop on the Jaguars and crushed their playoff hopes. That will not happen this year. Even though Houston got their first win last week, this one will end up getting ugly. My pick- JAGUARS

Cincinnati AT Baltimore- This one is a tough pick. The Bengals need to knock off the Ravens, a perennial division powerhouse. Baltimore had a great game Monday night against the Steelers, while the Bengals have struggled somewhat in recent weeks. The Bengals couldn't stop the Steelers rushing game, and I see Lewis/Taylor having a big day. My pick- RAVENS

Chicago AT new Orleans- The Saints just cannot win. The Bears look to be on their way to the playoffs with a silly defense, and an offense that can get the job done. My pick- BEARS

Seattle AT Arizona- Bobby Engram should be back for this one. Shaun Alexander will have a MONSTER game. Anquan Boldin is expected to miss this game with a bruise on his knee. Seattle is one of the top NFC teams right now, the Cards do not have a shot. My pick- SEAHAWKS

NY Giants AT San Francisco- Both teams are coming off huge, confidence boosting wins last week. However, the Niners are starting Cody Pickett, while the Giants are starting Eli Manning. I will take the Giants superstar lineup over the lonely 49ers. My pick- GIANTS

Pittsburgh AT Green Bay- The Steelers won't have Big Ben for this one. The Packers just cannot win though. The Steelers defense will be too strong. With the Bengals and Ravens playing in an important division game, the Steelers must win. My pick- STEELERS

Philadelphia AT Washington- T.O is not expected to play. Donovan is beyond banged up with the sports hernia and bruised ribs. Washington is coming off an embarrasing loss and has something to prove to their division rival at home. The Eagles offense won't do much on Washington's defense. The Redskins will use this oppurtunity in front of a national crowd to make up for last week. My pick- REDSKINS

Indianapolis AT New England- This is the game all of America will be watching. We all know the history. The mighty must always fall eventually though. Just like the Niners knocked off the Cowboys in the 90's, the Colts will knock off their arch nemesis New England, and continue their march towards the Super Bowl. My pick- COLTS

This was the night everyone has been waiting for. The Denver Nuggets home opener versus the L.A Lakers resulted in a sold out Pepsi Center. Storylines for this battle were dramatic. In fact, anytime Kobe Bryant plays in Denver since “the incident,” tensions run high. Speaking of Bryant, this is the first regular season game he is playing under Coach Phil Jackson since the soap opera ending to their first player/coach tenure. In the same manner as an Asian ping pong match, Kobe bashed Phil, Phil bashed Kobe, and back and forth. Finally the two smartened up, and realized they need each other in a professional relationship. Water under the bridge…

The game opened up with both teams trading jump shots. Lakers guard Smush Parker provided an early spark hitting two 1st quarter 3 pointers. Despite the deafening boos every time he touched the ball, Kobe Bryant lit up the Nuggets for 12 points in the first half. Denver never got a solid rhythm going early, yet Voshon Lenard did hit some early jumpers scoring 12 first half points. This is the last we would see of him. Kenyon Martin dominated the 2nd quarter in the paint scoring 8 points. Other than that, play was mostly scattered and unorganized. Fans were treated to cartons of milk at halftime. On the back under missing persons were the pictures of Carmelo Anthony, Marcus Camby, and Lamar Odom.

The second half was more of the same, both teams failing to play consistently. Devean George was the unsung hero for the Lakers scoring 9 of his 14 points in the second half. Furthermore, his smothering defense kept a struggling Carmelo Anthony in check. Smush Parker stayed hot, scoring 10 of his 20 points in the 3rd and 4th quarters, including a clutch 3 pointer with 37 seconds left to pull L.A within a point. Unfortunately for the Lakers, Lamar Odom failed to appear, (2-13 FG), and Chris Mihm could not hit important free throws, (5-10 FT.) For Denver, the half belonged to underrated guard Andre Miller (11 assists), and Marcus Camby, (19 points, 14 rebounds.) Seemingly play after play resulted in an alley oop dunk from Miller to Camby. However, sloppy play was everywhere as both teams racked up a total of 23 turnovers. In fact, Denver big man Francisco Elson turned the ball over 4 times in his 8 minutes of play, and superstars Anthony and Bryant had 6 turnovers a piece. With the final score 89-89, this one had to head to overtime.

Of course the overtime period belonged to Kobe Bryant. Phil Jackson had a calm demeanor on the bench, and looked as if he knew the Lakers would win. With both Camby and Anthony fouling out, options for the Nuggets were limited. Bryant dominated, scoring 8 points in the period, including a game winning pull up jumper with 0.6 seconds left.

This game was very important for both teams, as Denver fell to 0-2. In this seasons Western Conference, the Spurs rein supreme, and then just about every other team is lumped together fighting for the remaining seven playoff spots. Denver threw everyone they had at Bryant, including double and triple teams, and they still failed. If Lamar Odom can step up, and if Kwame Brown can do more than just look good in a Lakers uniform, L.A might just sneak into the playoffs. Bryant appears to be a much more mature player this season, looking to get everyone involved just like a true leader. On the other hand, the popular preseason pick Denver needs to step their game up. First and foremost, Carmelo Anthony needs to stop taking jumpers. When he attacks the basket, he seems unstoppable. Yet, he is always settling for tough jump shots, fading away from the basket. The loss of center Nene only furthers the Nuggets troubles. Denver’s frontcourt now rests on the old shoulders of Marcus Camby, and the weak knee of Kenyon Martin. Moreover, the team still can’t hit 3 pointers (2-12), a main problem from last season. Although we are only two days into the season, it is early games like these that will ultimately determine home court advantage in the playoffs.

I’m glad ESPN is on the Bears playoff bandwagon as of last night. Maybe they read my column from 2 weeks ago. Anyways, everyone and their mother are going to cover the NBA today. As a result, I plan on changing it up a bit, throwing a knuckleball in the equation. I want to talk about a subject everyone, not just sports fans love: the dentist. Before I start here is an abbreviated history: pickup basketball game, elbow, mouth, cracked tooth.

So, yesterday I go into the dentist. Everything starts out normal. I read a Sports Illustrated patiently as every other name in the waiting room is called before mine. Finally, Dr. P calls me back and invites me to sit in “the chair.” As I sit on the budget plastic cover, the bright light inches from my head nearly blinds me. Dr. P and I chat about the Ravens game from the night before, and a false sense of security lingers in my head. However, my stomach has that awkward feeling, not quite butterflies, more like vultures flying around in my stomach.

Right on cue Dr. P, short for Dr. Pain reaches into his bag of goodies. Then, the needle comes out. Not some little needle a dope junky uses, a long, diabolical needle. The evil device, dripping a clear liquid from the tip comes closer and closer, seemingly in a frame by frame animation. “Open Wide.”

As my mouth opens, my eyes automatically close. The pinpoint prick touches the gums overtop my front two teeth. Not a second later, the sharp needle penetrates my gums, and slowly pushes further and further upwards. A light taste of blood drips down onto my tongue. Meanwhile, the needle goes in so deep it feels like its inside my nose, the sharp tip poking around at my brain. Dr. P pushes the plunger all the way down. Then the needle slowly pulls out, the thin metal sliding against my gums and lips, exiting from the hole it created.

Next, Dr. P reaches into his infamous bag of goodies and pulls out Mr. Happy Drill. The spinning drill comes towards me in slow motion, and it sounds similar to an electronic pencil sharpener on steroids. While the drill bit roughly grinds what is left of my cracked tooth into shape, I finally start to lose it. Sharp chunks of the tooth getting drilled fly down my throat, fall on my tongue, and get stuck in-between my teeth. I’m still flossing out pieces this morning.

Now that the drilling process is over, Dr. P moves onto the final step, taking an impression of my teeth so he can order the proper veneer to stick on my half-tooth. I watch as Dr. P fills what appears to be a mouth guard with a thick gel. “Open Wide.” Now, imagine the smell of a dentist office. Okay, now try to imagine what a dentist office might taste like. This mouth guard contraption fills my mouth with a plastic like gel that tastes exactly like the dentist office you have in your head. Fortunately, this only lasts about 10 minutes, (yes that was heavy sarcasm.)

Finally the torture is over, and I stand up with half of my face numb and a drip of a plastic gel on my chin. While paying at the counter, I attempt to pick chunks of tooth out from in-between my teeth using my finger nails. “Hey Joey” Dr. P calls. “On your chart it says you chew pens, you really need to stop doing that, anyways I’ll see you in two weeks.” I hope I see you in hell one day doctor.